Once Tenley figured out that she was fathers golden nugget she developed games to satisfy her need to hurt, control and satisfy her need for conflict every day. Because it was never a good idea to be around my father, he had an affliction for children’s noise, he called it horseplay. I am not even sure what that means but it was something he constantly said “stop that horseplay in there”, “go to your room and don’t let me hear any horseplay”. Because of this I spent a lot of time in my room playing by myself with my toys. But even there I was not safe from her games. I would be in my room playing and Tenley would come barging in. She would walk, stomp, crush, etc… Whatever it was I was playing with. Of course this would piss me off so much I would start yelling at her and at a young and start crying.
Of course as always dad would have the same reaction. Because I was the one making noise and his little golden nugget was standing their pointing saying that “we were playing together and he ruined what we were doing” dad would take it out on me. This went on my entire childhood and would prove to be her favorite game.
Don’t get me wrong, I do understand children, the sibling thing. I have two boys that are close in age as well. I see the games, manipulation, jealousy, etc… This was different. It was just downright mean. If we were playing together that would be one thing. But seriously, she would just come running in and cause the chaos that would always result in my being punished.
Even when I had no involvement whatsoever she would find a way to bring me into it. I could be upstairs in my room minding my own business. Tenley would do something to get in trouble on her own. So, I would here mom and dad coming down on her. She would pour on the charm with dad and make up stuff that was way worse then what she had done and claimed that I did them. Dad of course would buy into it every time and turn his attentions on me. Imagine minding your own business and overhearing the conversation. Then all of a sudden your summand downstairs in order to defend yourself against claims that re just untrue. Over time it just becomes less exhausting to just accept it and not even try to fight it because in reality once dad was done yelling about it I would just be sent back to my room to play by myself again, exactly where I was before the confrontation. And in the end Tenley would get what she wanted because her diversions would always work. After all, she was the mirror and dad didn’t want to believe that it could have been her/him to begin with. That sounds like very strange logic I know. But that is the reality of how narcissists and sociopaths work, it is not logical in any way.
Tenley Myers and Drunky Gang Up
Another similar story that happened when we were visiting my cousin Drunky and her family in Michigan demonstrates how Jack would side with Tenley by default. Like most houses in the Midwest which I was unused to growing up in LA was they had a huge basement. It had the standard extra refrigerator, ping pong table, TV with old ripped up couch, etc… There was a staircase going up the side of one wall to the main floor that didn’t have a railing. After we had been there for a few days I was used to just going down and playing by myself while all the adults were upstairs talking and Tenley and Drunky were off doing whatever they were doing. The two of them got along very well.
I was walking up the stairs and Tenley came around the corner and stopped me. Drunky then came around and went below me on the stairs. The two of them grabbed me as I was trying to get passed and the wrestling match was on. I couldn’t figure out why they were doing it but looking back I am pretty sure it was just boredom. Eventually they overpowered me and threw me off the side of the stairs. Because the basement was just a concrete slab with carpet and no padding it hurt. It hurt badly. So of course I started crying. At that point Tenley and Drunky ran upstairs and told our parents that I was messing around on the stairs and fell off. They even went so far as to tell them that they had been warning me to be careful before it happened.
At this point because I again had interrupted my father at commanding the room he got pissed. He came down and showed no concern about how I was. To him it was never about that. He went on to yell at me for being stupid and interrupting everyone. This was nothing new to me by this point.